Progressive politics, ideas & culture


Eighth Greatest Canadian turns 190

This Magazine Staff

Happy Birthday, Sir John A! Things are going along swimmingly here in your great Dominion. Newfoundland is going to separate (yes, we got them at last), Quebec is going to separate, Alberta is going to separate, and B.C. would separate except they’re too busy sea-kayaking in the morning and snowboarding in the afternoon to bother. Saskatchewan might just separate, unless Alberta takes them over first.
Weird, huh? I’ll bet you thought that Nova Scotia and the Manitobans would be the real problems. In the east, Old Joe Howe tried to take his province out not ten minutes after they’d been brought in. And of all the people to hold a grudge against Ottawa, you’d think it’d be the folk around Selkirk.
Anyway, I know if you were still around you’d find a way to hold the whole rickety contraption together. A quick snooze in your office, a jug of gin, a pile of money to spread around, and a good round of Yankee bashing would set whole nation rallying around the Old Chieftain once again. After all, if we don’t hang together, we’ll hang separately, right?

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